Tag Archives: kidnapping

Job Openings at 60 Minutes

OK, note to self, when planning a daring children rescue attempt in Lebanon, make sure the father (who allegedly refuses to return them to Australia) doesn’t have access to the email account being used to arrange the kidnapping. Just saying 60 Minutes, just saying.  The father, on reading the details of the attempt to snatch back his kids , notified authorities. Another fine mess. Now the distraught mother of the kids, Tara Brown (the presenter), the 60 Minutes crew and the professional kidnappers all face the wrath of the Lebanese government. Meanwhile, the children are safely back with the American born Lebanese father who is laying charges against the lot of them. The price for trying to cover this story ….. 20 years .

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That’s One Scary Mugshot!

Good lord Caius Veiovis what have you done to yourself? The Massachusetts man and his mates are facing murder and kidnapping charges. Hmm, you don’t say!

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under Friggin Scary, I'm Just Saying !

Does it matter which Jeff Muller?

Here’s the thing people, it is OK to stun gun a man, kidnap him and then drive him 1,200 miles IF you have abducted the right friggin person. OK, not OK, but for goodness sakes you would think one of the three men who kidnapped New Jersey pet store owner Jeff Muller would have had a clue. Hmm, seems not. Douglas Stangeland,Lonnie Swarnes, and Andrew Wadel are all accused of first degree kidnapping after shooting Muller with a stun gun and then abducting him outside his shop.  Fortunately the men had a little car trouble and Muller made a valiant attempt to escape and in doing so was spotted by a convenience store clerk who rang the cops. It was later learned that the kidnappers didn’t have the right Jeff Muller. Imposter 1 , dumbassed kidnappers 0.

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Filed under Evolution Be Damned!, Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Hilarious, Whoops!

For The Love Of A Cell Phone

Yeah, I am planning to have another one, I want an iPod

OK people, you desperately want a cell phone, what do you do? Come on people think, what do you do? Well, if you are the young Chinese couple currently detained by Chinese police, you’d sell your six day old son, thats what. The couple who were unemployed and broke got a nice 2,500 yuan ($368) for their troubles (who they gonna call?). Sadly the child was on sold two more times, the last being  for 10,000 yuan ($1,470), before police were notified by suspicious locals. Geez, imagine how many cell phones you could get…ah never mind. Anywho, baby is now in hospital and the couple won’t be getting him back anytime soon. Police are currently cracking down on the kidnapping and sale of children on the Chinese black market. Some gangs have been going into rural areas to steal children to be sold to rich childesss couples for up to $10,000. Couples with girls need not worry, the preferred victims are boys.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Wrong, I'm Just Saying !, They Live Among Us !

I Know It Looks Bad Officer But I Can Explain!

Step away from the car

Step away from the car

OK parents, wrapping your kid up like he was a piece of furniture is just asking for trouble.Anne and Harald Wellbrock from Neustadt, Germany, were trying to make a house move a little easier for their five year old son Stephan by playing “Your a piece of furniture” game. So they wrapped him in packing tape and put him in the back of the car. Unfortunately people who witnessed “the game” thought the child was being kidnapped and rang police. As the Wellbrock family went on their merry way with the youngster wriggling around in the back the armed police were preparing for a kidnap rescue mission. The parents had a lot of explaining to do when they were eventually pulled over and the gun toting police removed a now terrified Stephan from the car still wrapped in packing tape.

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Filed under Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Hilarious, Friggin Loon Award, How Embarrassing, Whoops!