Don’t Annoy The Nurse

An Italian nurse has been bumping off patients she found annoying. Oh and she had also been killing patients whose relis were annoying too. The nasty nurse was caught after potassium was found in one of her victims. After further investigation they discovered 38 patients under her care had died . One of her work mates said the nurse was basically a cold hearted bitch recalling how she had once given a patient a powerful laxative at the end of one of her shifts to give the other nurses an enormous mess to clean up .

Killer Python

Forget dengue fever Bali has a new killer and it comes in the form of a 4.5m killer python. Yes, the reptile has already crushed  the life of out of a security guard at a luxury hotel and is currently on the loose. Feet up people.

Crime Scene on Facebook

OMG I pressed like!!!!

Oh for crying out loud , a Facebook user has just gone too far.And by too far I mean killing his wife and then posting a picture of her on the social media site. He even posted a message with it …. ” I’m going to prison or death sentence for killing my wife love you guys miss you guys take care Facebook people you will see me in the news.” The killer had listed his occupation on Facebook as “actor” on Burn Notice but it seems he was just an extra on one ep in 2008. Enjoy the orange jumpsuit you creep.

Want sauce with that?

I Did It My Way

A killer on death row in Ohio has killed himself days before he was to be executed.

I’m Just Sitting Here Watching The Wheels Go Round and Round

It’s that time again when Mark Chapman comes up for parole and Yoko Ono is forced to send a letter saying DON’T. This will be the seventh time John Lennon’s killer will face the board and Ono’s 7th letter. In his last hearing he told the parole board he murdered the ex Beatle because he wanted ‘instant notoriety’ so he could ‘become someone’ but ‘I became a murderer and murderers are not somebodies.’ Hmm, that really isn’t remorseful, that’s a tad narcissistic . Better hurry up and send that letter Yoko!!!

Why Do The British Bother Having Laws?

Jeremy Bamber murdered his parents, his sister and her two children in 1985 and was given a sentence of life behind bars without a chance of ever being release. Bamber thinks the sentence is ‘inhuman and degrading,’ and is appealing to the Grand Chamber of European Court of Human Rights. This case will test whether the UK law, allowing dangerous offenders to be sentenced to whole life tariffs, will be allowed.  Seriously? I think the UK should break away from this so called “human rights” treaty with Europe if its laws are put into question continually. A country should have the right to govern as it sees fit, especially if it is designed to protect the majority from the evil that lurks among a selected few. Nanny State indeed. Oh and there is a queue of life tariff murderers and lawyers excitedly awaiting the decision.

Psst What “human rights” did his victims have?  Shouldn’t the court be protecting THEIRS not HIS?

Zodiac Killer Is Still Alive

OK Loons, I know you have heard it all before but retired highway cop believes he knows who the Zodiac Killer is. Well it’s about friggin time someone does! The Zodiac killer haunted San Fransisco Bay area in the 1960’s, randomly killing people while dressed in a strange hood and then sending cryptic letters to newspapers and police. Lyndon Lafferty believes the killer is a 91 year old man still living in California. What’s even worse is he believes that the Zodiac  had been protected by corrupt officials and police because the Zodiac’s wife was having an affair with a prominent judge. And what’s even worse still, he’s written a book on it  without revealing his identity . Seriously people, shouldn’t your main aim be to have the bastard arrested instead of making money from writing books?

Want sauce with that?

That Would Be Mrs Ripper To You

Just when you thought the Jack the Ripper story couldn’t get anymore weird a British author is now claiming the infamous murderer may have been Lizzie the Ripper. John Morris believes Lizzie Williams, the wife of the royal physician Sir John Williams (also a suspect), killed the women because she couldn’t have kids. Three of the victims had their wombs cut out for starters. Anywho, he’s written a book entitled Jack The Ripper: The Hand Of A Woman which he says will leave no doubt in the readers mind, it was a friggin night prowling, psycho woman.

Killer Jumps From Window Guns A Blazing

OMG, I stayed glued to TV for two days waiting for something to happen in the French killer siege …. glued I say, glued! And then guess what? Went out to dinner and all hell broke loose. Huge gun fight, with alleged killer, Mohamed Merah, jumping from the window with all guns ablaze!!! Where the hell was I? Eating friggin chili mussels and garlic bread!!! Heavy sigh!!!

Racist Serial Killer On Loose In France

Authorities have linked the helmet wearing killer of three Jewish children and a Rabbi in France yesterday to two other shootings. Each has happened in four day intervals and has targeted ethnic minorities. The killer seeks his victims whilst riding his scooter, then walks clamly up to them and shoots them at point blank range. His victims so far are  a paratrooper in civilian clothing, two airbourne troops (North African decent), three children and a teacher from the Ozar Hatorah school (Jewish decent).

UPDATE: Authorities now believe the killer filmed his crimes. The gunman is believed to have been wearing an apparatus around his neck which they think was a video camera.