Tag Archives: knife

Kitty Litter Fight Ends In Tears

Kitty litter fight ends in tearsRefuse to clean the kitty litter? That’s a death threat from your knife welding hubby right there. But on the bright side he gets a charge of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and a $1,000 bail bond for his troubles. No word on whether the cat still has its legs crossed.

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under Friggin Gross, Thanks For Nothing

Boob Job Saves Russian Woman’s Life

A Russian woman is thanking her lucky stars she got herself a boob job after her hubby plunged a knife into her chest during a domestic and it couldn’t penetrate all that silicon. Doctors conferred that without her big knockers she would have been dead. The unnamed woman got into a fight with her husband and in a fit of anger he picked up a knife and stabbed her in the left boob. The knife failed to reach the heart thanks to her state-of-the-art implants. Oh and added bonus, they didn’t leak either.

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, You Go Girl!

Rapist No More

Attention all rapists, take heed, a woman in Bangladesh cut off a man’s penis after he allegedly attempted to rape her and then went promptly to a police station armed with the appendage as evidence. The woman told police the man, who had been harassing her for months, attacked her while she was sleeping but managed to grab a knife and whoosh, off it fell. The severed penis is being kept at the police station whilst the suspected rapist receives treatment at a hospital. Hmm, I guess he won’t be doing that ever again!

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Move On, Nothing To See Here

Whoopsie daisy, British police failed to notice a knife in the back of a man found dead in his bedroom. Antoine Denis was found slumped in his room in Kent when police arrived at the scene. They claimed there was nothing suspicious and the body was carted off to the undertakers. It wasn’t long before the undertaker discovered the weapon sticking out of his back. In police defence they said it was dark and he was lying on his back.

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Whoops!

Blade Runner

Oh shit, no wonder he had a splitting headache!

Urgh, a man has had a knife removed from his head after 3 friggin years. Originally Brazilian doctors told him there was no friggin way they were going to attempt to remove the blade from the front of his head. Hello, brain damage and a lawsuit from hell. But poor Edeilson Nascimento had one big continual headache for three years so a team of seven doctors finally removed it this week. I’m guessing Nascimento won’t be getting into anymore bar fights.

Psst Sheez, imagine the pain when he sneezed?

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, That's Gotta Hurt, Well I Never

Touchy Subject?

OK here’s the thing guys, don’t be telling a girl she has stinky feet, that’s a stabbing. It’s alleged Amber Smith deliberately stabbed a man after  he had teased her  at a party. The incident happened  after she failed to complete a backflip off a deck and then attempted to rub her socks in his face. Oh boy, that’s when he told her she had smelly feet. Yikes!  As she was leaving she picked up a steak knife and plunged it into his back on the way out. Now he has a punctured lung and she has a court date.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, That's Gotta Hurt, Well I Never, Whoops!

The Dangers of Drinking

OK loons, there are two people at fault here. Firstly, there’s the brother who came home with the wrong kind of beer and secondly Lorraine Bulloch for getting so angry about it she threw a knife at him and missed, leaving a three year old with a knife in her head. Savannah police say that Ms Bulloch allegedly chucked a knife at her bro after he returned home with the wrong brand of beer but managed to duck. Unfortunately the little girl wasn’t so lucky and copped it in the head. She is currently in hospital with serious injuries. Ms Bulloch was arrested.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, I'm Just Saying !, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

Don’t Tell Mom

Mommy!!!!!

Oh for goodness sakes, sure you expect a knife wielding teenager to beg the clerk not to call the police after he fails in his robbery attempt. But honey, you lose all self respect when you also beg him not to tell your mom too. The teen allegedly slid behind the counter at a Maverik store in Salt Lake City and attempted to hold the knife to the clerk’s neck but he was too slow and the clerk kaboomed him to the floor. That’s when the teen  pleaded with the clerk not to call the cops or tell his mom. He was last scene fleeing the scene on foot….wee,wee, wee all the way home.

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Honey, Why Is There A Knife In Your Neck?

It's a growing phenomenon!

When a man from Wodonga in Victoria hopped into bed his wife wanted to know why there was blood spurting from his neck all over the clean sheets. The man then admitted he had been in a fight but had no idea he had been injured. When the paramedics arrived they broke the bad news to him, a blade had broken off in his neck and it was millimeters from his spine. Now there’s a very slow ride  to the Royal Melbourne hospital.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Scary, That's Gotta Hurt, Well I Never, Whoops!

Icelandic Rapper Rage

My Bad?

Hmm, probably not a good idea to try and interview two Icelandic rappers  about their differences on radio. Mori (Magnús Ómarsson) rocked up to radio station X-id 97.7 in Reykjavík with a stun gun, knife and a Doberman while  Erpur Eyvindarson came empty handed. Before they could even get to a microphone Mori attacked Erpur with the knife. Luckily Erpur was able to defend himself with a mop. No word on what the Doberman did!

Psst Evidently they were fighting over who began rapping first. Hello, as if anyone cares ! One things for sure,  they don’t have their pants on the ground there!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never, Whoops!