Tag Archives: mauled to death

Things Not To Do In Alaska

Holy friggin werewolf Batman, a female special education teacher has been mauled to death by a wolf while jogging in Alaska. Candice Berner had only just arrived in Chignik to start work at a local school. The body was found by a group who’s been clam digging and say the wolf  had been stalking them earlier in the day.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, End Credit, Friggin Wildlife, Whoops!

Isn’t It Ironic

Man's best friend my ass!

A Slovenian doctor who saved his three vicious bullmastiff dogs from being put down after they attacked several people has been found mauled to death by them. Whoopsie. Police say all three pooches took turns at  biting him. The doctor had been embroiled in a four year battle to get the dogs off death row and sparked a major controversy when he won the right to have them returned.  Oh well, now they are just one big happy family in heaven, because  the dogs have been finally put down. Doctor 0, Bullmastiffs 0, public 1

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Wildlife, I'm Just Saying !, Whoops!

Isn’t It Ironic?

My bad?

OMG, one of life’s little ironies. A man who fought the Canadian courts to keep his pet tiger has been found dead. Hmm, seems his 300kg cat wasn’t too appreciative after all and mauled Norman Buwalda to death. A family member is believed to have found the body in the tiger’s pen. The Southwold township had been trying to stop Mr Buwalda keeping lions and tigers on his property after a 10 year old boy was attacked in 2004. Tiger 1 2 , Owner 0

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Wildlife, I'm Just Saying !, Whoops!

There’s A Bear In There

Militants mauled to death by bears

My Bad?

OMG, being a Hizbul Mujahideen militant can sometimes be a bitch, especially if you hide in a cave frequented by friggin bears. Hmm, seems two commanders decided to make there hide-out in a cave in Darwal Nar in Pir Panjal. What they didn’t know was it was already being occupied by some very nasty bears who didn’t take too kindly to terrorists. Needless to say the militants were mauled to death before they could so much as mutter WTF!

Psst The real bummer was their bodies were discovered next to two Ak 47 rifles and some ammunition. See, told you it can be a bitch!

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Filed under End Credit, Friggin Awesome, Friggin Wildlife, Whoops!