Tag Archives: Michigan

Snowflakes Chance

The heat just got turned down a notch in Hell. Seems the Michigan 5 acre property rightfully named Hell, has struggled to sell despite a group called Damned trying to raise the $999,666 price tag on a kickstarter site. Now Hell can be all yours for $900,000, which includes Hell’s Chapel of Love, Screams Putt-Putt Golf Course and a gift shop (hmm, let me guess, handbags?). Anywho, go to Hell.

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Filed under Well I Never

This Little Piggy Went Wee Wee Wee

Want to know why this Michigan pig can’t wipe that big old smile off his face?

pig patrol

 

Hmm, probably because he did the all mightiest crap in the back seat of the Shelby Police Department’s cop car after he was caught wandering the streets. Pity the fool who has to clean up that mess.

pig patrol poop

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Filed under Friggin Gross, Friggin Wildlife

Slippery Slide

pooAttention good folks of Michigan, it seems you have a mystery pooper in one of your popular parks. The defecator, who has been at it for months, leaves little piles on the slides at Ypsilanti’s Prospect Park. So far they have avoided getting caught but just so you know …. they have cameras set up now you dirty, dirty stinker.

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Filed under Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Gross

Most Expensive graduation Cap EVER

Alex Benda could just be the next Gordon Gekko after he announced he wants to sell advertising space on his graduation cap. The business major is hoping he can make enough to put a dent in his student loan. He has divided the top of his  10 inch x 10 inch cap into 1 inch squares with each square costing $300 to advertise. By his calculations if he sells all of the 100 squares it will cover his $30,000 debt. Shame he lives in Flint, Michigan… just saying.OK, settle people from Flint the kid has already sold $1,200.

Psst Reminds me of Million Dollar Homepage which we participated in a few years back. Alex Tew made $1 million dollars by selling a million pixels for $1 each on a homepage.I had a cofffee with the 21 year old during the height of his fame and he too just wanted enough money to pay for Uni and get a decent start in life. I swear it has something to do with guys called Alex!

See, that's my tongue poking cow from my Loon Header

See, that’s my tongue poking cow from my Loon Header

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Filed under Well I Never, You Go Girl!

I’m So Awesome I Think I Might Erect A Statue Of Myself

Your the former mayor of Flint, Michigan of course you are going to erect a statue of yourself outside your house, dah! You go Donald J. Williamson.

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Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Well I Never

Well That Takes The Cake!

Who’s there?

OMG, Michigan are installing talking urinal cakes in pubs in their never ending fight against drunk drivers. That’s right guys, when you step up to a urinal cake it will play a recorded message reminding you to catch a cab or grab a lift with a friend if you are pissed. I’m not sure if you have to actually pee on it to activate it!!!!

Psst What would be cooler is if you pissed on it and it gave you your blood alcohol reading.

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Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Well I Never

OMG Terrorists Putting Subliminal Messages In Porn

Honey, do you see four letter words on this here movie?

You know what I hate? When those damn Al Qaeda put subliminal messages in your porn. I really friggin hate that! A man from Michigan rang police after he suspected  terrorists had inserted secret messages into his porn movie. When police arrived he showed them the offending section in the movie in slow motion and sure enough there were maybe four readable words. He told police he reported the incident because he had read about the evil tactics of the Al Qaeda.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Well I Never

Woman Loads Christmas Gifts Into Wrong Car

Oh no, a woman in Michigan accidentally loaded  her Christmas presents into the wrong car. Linda Gipson merrily loaded about $700 worth of gifts into the trunk of what she thought was her daughter’s car and then went back to shop. When she returned the car was gone and so to her pressies (well, what a waste of time that was!). The real bummer is Ms Gipson used her daughter’s car key to open the stranger’s trunk.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

Never Too Young To Rob A Store

My Bad?

Two things sweetie when trying to hold up a convenience store 1. make sure you ain’t a regular and 2. make sure you ain’t friggin 12 years old! Gosh! The Michigan girl allegedly waltzed into the store with a 9mm gun and demanded cash. The staff , who instantly recognized her (despite a bandanna over her face), thought she was kidding around. Hmm, evidently not. Anywho, someone grabbed her and rang 911. Now she will have something to tell the class during “show and tell”.

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

So Honey, What Ya Doing?

Dad, why did you bother?

How do you know you have too much time on your hands? When you recreate da Vinci’s “Last Supper” using lint from your dryer. Phew, for a minute I thought it was gonna be from your belly button fluff. Anywho, it took Laura Bell from Michigan 800 hours of laundry  and  200 hours of painstaking work to recreate the 14ft reproduction of the masterpiece. She even bought towels in various colors to get the right shades of lint (now that’s dedication). Ripley’s Believe It or Not are now planning to put it on display.

Psst I wonder if Ripley would be interested in my reproduction of  ‘The Scream’ made from shower drain hair?

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Filed under Friggin Awesome, Well I Never