Oh no Loons, someone has stolen a 300lb bronze statue of Lorax from the property of the late Dr Seuss. The statue was standing on on the stump of a Truffula tree and we all know what that means, if someone doesn’t have a seed to replace the tree we’re all screwed!!! I bet it was the Grinch because the cat in the hat is too goddam lazy!!!
Tag Archives: missing
Former EastEnders actress Gemma McCluskie is feared dead after a headless body was pulled from a canal in London. Her brother has been arrested in connection with her disappearance and police are yet to confirm if the body is that of Ms McCluskie. Friends of the actress organized a massive search after she was reported missing last week. Sad.
A woman in Chatham rang 999 (911 equivalent) after she discovered her snowman was missing from her front yard. No loons, not an ornament, a snowman made from friggin snow. She told police “I thought that with it being icy and there not being anyone about he’d be safe”. Hmm, obviously not, the sun can be a bitch!
A contestant on the US dating show Bachelorette has been found dead near a California highway. Julien Hug competed for the heart of Jillian Harris in the 2009 series but only lasted two weeks before being eliminated. He had been missing since Monday. Jillian Harris said she is “completely heartbroken” over the news.
Oh dear god, a guinea pig British nurse who was injected with malaria during a clinical trial has gone AWOL and if he doesn’t get emergency attention within 48 hours he could die . Matthew Lloyd rang in sick during the second part of the trial which included the antidote/vaccine. Police went to Lloyd’s apartment but found no sign of him.