You spend nearly two weeks in a flooded, batshit covered cave in the dark with 12 of your friends. The world watches while collective heads are scratched wondering how they are going to get you out before the monsoon rains come. You then discover you are to be knocked out so you can get hauled through dangerous ragged caverns without freaking the hell out. You see the light, you are safe, you get your promised KFC, you are so grateful to be alive then your parents tell you…”hey son, you are becoming a monk’. Yep, seems the Wild Boars are about to all become monks as a repayment for the life of the Navy Seal that was lost during the rescue. Sheez, all they ever wanted to do was kick a football around!
Tag Archives: monks
A group of monks in India are hoping the government will allow them to poop in public. Yep, they want to have the rights, on religious grounds, to crap wherever they like. The dilemma facing the government now is, exempt the monks or go with public health initiatives which includes abolishing public defecation by 2019.
A group of Franciscan monks are so pissed off over the theft of their bibles from a church in Florence they are collectively praying for the culprit to be struck down with a bad case of diarrhoea. Yep, you heard me, they want him/her to get the shits big time. They even went so far as to pin a note up for all the congregation to see which reads, if the thief doesn’t see the errors of their ways “We pray to God that the thief is struck by a strong bout of the shits.” The bibles were stolen from the 15th century church of San Salvatore al Monte and are rare and expensive.