When Putin’s presidential BMW gets taken out by a wayward Merc you would have to be suspicious right? The Russian president’s favourite official driver was killed instantly when the Putin-less car was hit head on for no apparent reason. Fortunately or unfortunately the driver of the Merc survived and is currently in hospital.
OK, just stop it. Introducing the Crazy Toilet Cafe in Moscow. Don’t ask me Loons, the thought of eating a burger off a bedpan or sipping a drink from a urinal is not at all appealing. The owner is none other than the man who gave the world the first G-spot sex museum. What have we learnt from this loons? Hmm, that leap from communism to capitalism is thwart with danger and crap.
Dodgy phone psychic have been busted in Moscow. Seem the ring of so called psychics had been telling people they were cursed before charging them a whopping fee to remove it over the phone. The service was advertised on a popular cable network . Dumbasses. Sheez, if they were real psychics they would have seen the 10 years in jail coming.
You are driving along minding your own business when KABOOM, you are showered with Russian plane debris. I hate that. Lucky you caught it all on tape because you know how damn cynical insurance companies are these days.
Breaking News – Seems a suicide bomber had kaboomed himself at Moscow’s main international airport killing at least 31 people and injuring over 130. The Moscow police are treating the incident as a terrorist attack and are now on a full terror alert. The explosion at the Domodedovo Airport is believed to have happened in the arrivals hall at around 4.32pm as travelers were collecting their luggage. There are concerns for British Airlines passengers who arrived just before the explosion. Ball-bearings and screws have been found at the scene suggesting it was definitely a terrorist attack.
I thought she loved me!!!!
The world of espionage is alive and kicking, if the 19 year old relatively unknown Russian model, Ekaterina “Katya” Gerasimova, is to believed. Seems she’s a secret agent for the Kremlin (aka Mr Putin) with the sole aim of luring government critics into embarrassing sex traps. Hmm, seems to be working. Six suckers have already seen the inside of her Moscow flat and bed ( paid for by the secret service). Too bad it’s rigged with sophisticated recording devices. Isn’t that right Mikhail Fishman (editor of Russian Newsweek), who was taped snorting cocaine as Katya walked around naked.
Psst So I am guessing all the gay critics are safe?
If you really suck at being a Sumo you could always use your skills for evil. I will ignore the obvious question of WTF was a sumo doing in Moscow, but evidently the big guy ripped a cash machine out of a store and walked off with it on his shoulders. The 90kg cash machine contained 25,000 roubles which is about 12 cents….kidding $926. Being big and fat has it’s disadvantages, like being friggin slow … the Sumo and his mate got caught trying to get their fat asses into the BMW getaway car.