So That’s Why All The Secrecy

Man, this home brew Coke recipe is amazing

Hey, remember last week when Coca Colas secret recipe was revealed and I said “wow, I didn’t know Coke contained alcohol”. Yeah, well about that, seems I wasn’t the only one surprised. Introducing the $1.2 billion class action by Israeli Muslims,  Advs. Hani Tannus, Ofir Cohen, and Mahmud Machjana . They are seeking  compo for each Muslim in Israel (that’s 1.2 million) for the mental anguish caused by Coca Cola’s misleading ways . Hello, Muslims are forbidden from drinking alcohol, that’s mental anguish right there. The suit reads in part “This is one of the greatest deceptions in the history of consumer affairs, when a company ignores the existence of alcohol as an ingredient despite being aware that the Muslim world abstains from products like these. This is a very serious matter and it certainly won’t be the last in the world in light of the fraud.”
Oh boy, wait until the moms of America unite with their class action. Brockovich will be busy!

Al Qaeda Planting Peaceful Sleeper Muslims in the US

I knew it, I friggin knew it!

World War III Has Only Just Begun

Well, well, well!!!!

Holy crap people , I don’t want to put a bummer on your week but Mr Baba Vanga, a prophet of some note (cough, cough), believes  WWIII has just begun (not pointing fingers at North Korea BUT!!!) . It will be nuclear, annihilate the crap out of the northern hemisphere and set the Muslims off on a war against surviving Europeans. It will end November 2014. Yippee! Hmm, sorry folks, Vanga has no idea who will win the Superbowl next year.

Psst If you want to check out his predictions for the future click here.

Move Over David Suzuki

Holy acid rain Batman, seems Osama Bin Laden is worried about climate change. I would think that was the least of his worries! Anywho, Bin Laden has stepped back up to the mic to  plead with fellow Muslims to take preventive measures to help deal with climate change. The recent floods in Pakistan and Jeddah have obviously been an eye opener for the reclusive cave dweller (I’m guessing he got his sandals wet). Good luck with that new cause. Mother Nature 1, Western hating Al Qaeda terrorist on kidney dialysis 0.

Manchester United Going To Hell In A Handbag

Well, well, well, seems Muslim Manchester United fans  may have to find a new team to support after a Malaysian cleric declared the football clubs team crest un-Islamic. Nooh Gadot has told supporters not to wear the red jersey as it has  Devil’s emblem as it’s crest (sheez ,took your own sweet time recognizing that!). Gadot said  “Devils are our enemies, why would you put their picture on you and wear it? You are only promoting the devil.” So far there has been no Fatwa against the club , but Manchester United aren’t alone, football shirts of Brazil, Portugal, Barcelona, Serbia and Norway, which carry emblems of the cross, are also off limits.

Psst No probs, just get  “Nanny State” to make the English football team change their team crest.

If It’s Tuesday, This Must Be Ban A Burqa in Belgium!

Sheez, I better get to a hairdresser!!!

Well, well, well, Belgium has pipped France to the post by being the first country to ban the burqa. Yes sirree, a new bill has been written to ban the use of clothes or veils which cover the face and stop the wearer from being identified. Liberal Deputy Denis Ducarme said “We’re the first country to spring the locks that have made a good number of women slaves, and we hope to be followed by France, Switzerland, Italy, and the Netherlands; countries that think.” If ignored people face a fine or a jail sentence. Hey, don’t get your knickers in a knot , Iran and Saudi Arabia  have similar dress codes for westerners. Phew…the pressure is pretty much off the South Park dudes.

Psst And cue human rights organizations… can you hear the screeching Clarice?

I Say Persian, You Say Arabian

I was really fearing doing the hurdles!

Oh boy, seems the Islamic Solidarity Games, which is intended to be a happy fest among Muslim nations and designed to strengthen ties, has been canceled over a waterway tiff. It all started when Iran, who are hosting the sporting event this year, put “Persian Gulf” on the logo . It seems all the other Arab nations call the waterway the “Arabian Gulf” and were pretty pissed when its “common” name was used. Meanwhile Iran stands firm saying, tough, that is what it has historically been known. End result… “The federation regrettably declares the cancellation of the games in Iran because the organisers did not comply with the rules of games and the federation’s bylaws,” Well, at least they had 5 good solidarity years before this.

Psst Additional bummer, women were going to be allowed to compete this year.

Police Play Dress Up

Hey psst, is that you Constable Smith?

A program dubbed “In your shoes” has raised a few eyebrows in the community, after it was revealed three British policewomen were ordered to spend the day dressed in burkhas so they could get a better understanding of the way Muslims live in South Yorkshire. Many believe the police should stop playing dress ups and go catch criminals. Matthew Elliott from the Taxpayers’ Alliance said “People want the police out catching criminals, not indulging in politically correct gimmicks.” Douglas Murray, of the Centre for Social Cohesion think-tank went on to add it was not the duty of police to empathize with particular members of the community. While British police are understaffed and overworked it seems a ridiculous way to spend taxpayers money. Next they’ll be dressing like criminals to better understand their way of life!

Psst Hmm, wouldn’t it be nice if the Muslim women dressed like westerners so they get a better understanding of the community they have chosen to live in!