I just want to put it out there, I don’t understand air guitarists. Seriously, if you can’t play a real guitar step away from the stage. Apparently, this month is Air Guitar National Championships in New York. What are the judges looking for, you may well ask? Evidently not a friggin guitar! According to the article, I am currently reading, it all comes down to “technical merit, stage presence and the “ineffable quality of airness.” What the hell does “technical merit” mean? They DON’T have a FRGGIN guitar. People, get jobs or take some guitar lessons…anything.
Please don’t let this be fake news…. OMG…scent of kitten fur
Ever wanted to take a dump in an 18-karat gold toilet? Friday is your chance loons. Yep, the Guggenheim Museum in New York has installed a gold toilet in the public toilets. The fully functional loo was designed by Italian sculptor Maurizio Cattelan.
This is how the museum announced it….
“Its participatory nature, in which viewers are invited to make use of the fixture individually and privately, allows for an experience of unprecedented intimacy with a work of art,”
What is worse than Donald Trump’s hair? Hmm, how’s about naked Donald Trump statues. Dear lord. A Cleveland artist is responsible for the life size Trump sculptures that have popped up in around New York, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Seattle and Cleveland. Some things can’t be unseen.
Psst : The plaques on the statues read “The Emperor has no balls”.
Oh bless, the old “make my own license plate number” trick. A woman from New York thought she had successfully fooled the cops when she got out her colouring pens and whipped up a NY plate for her uninsured car. Unfortunately a sharp eyed office spied the ruse. Hmmm, I wonder if she will be making them where she’s going?
Oh dear, the New York Central Park Ice Festival has been cancelled because…wait for it…. it’s too cold.
Oh no, what are the odds that at the exact time you were having your 16th birthday party, a shower of feces rains down on you? Jacinta and 40 guests were merrily celebrating the big event in their New York backyard when they looked up into the sky and no, it’s not a bird , no it’s not Superman…..but five friggin planes. The likelihood is one of the those planes decided to dump their motherload of sh*t onto them. The father was just grateful they had finished eating the birthday cake minutes before the brown shower.
OK loons, this is what I don’t understand, how can you carry $61,000 of heroin in your undies, without them dragging along the ground? Seriously, drug smugglers must have some awesome super strength secrets in their lingerie. Anywho , one Colombian dude wasn’t snug enough to outsmart New York customs. See ya.
Step away from the suspicious bag . New Yorker Port Authority police were left a little red faced after they discovered a sus silver bag behind a barrier at the George Washington Bridge Bus Station and evacuated the area. Enter the canine unit and explosives experts who determined the offending item was in fact a box full of assorted condoms. As you were, nothing to see here.