Tag Archives: north carolina

Pizza Travesty

911Hello is this 911? I want to make a complaint about Subway. They damn made my flatbread pizza with marinara sauce instead of pizza sauce and they won’t give me no refund. Say What? You can’t charge me with misuse of the 911 system, or I’ll go and friggin ring investigators at Channel 9. Hello, is this Channel 9?

Psst The woman was arrested and charged.


Filed under Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never

No One Touches The Pop Tarts!!!

Mother has her son arrested for stealing her pop tartsA sweet toothed mother had her juvenile son arrested for stealing her Pop Tarts. The kid is now facing larceny/misdemeanor charges. I wonder if they were the 100s and 1000s ones?

Psst North Carolina


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Sore Loser, Well I Never

Lord Almighty

A woman was arrested after assaulting someone with a bibleA woman in North Carolina has been charged with assault using a deadly Bible . The woman allegedly used the Good Book to thump another woman, leaving her covered in cuts and bruises. No word on what the fight was about but I’m guessing it wasn’t Luke 6:29.


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, That's Gotta Hurt, Well I Never

Church vs Vultures

Church hangs dead vulture from steepleHoly roof eating birds from hell, Batman. The Bethlehem Baptist Church in North Carolina has a little prob. They have been over run with vultures. So much so they have commissioned someone to make a dead vulture effigy in an attempt to scare them off. The effigy is hanging upside down from the church’s steeple. Begone roof eating vultures.


Filed under Friggin Wildlife

The KKK Are Alive and Well In Harmony

Check out the front page headline news of a North Carolina newspaper.


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World

Change For A Million ?

OK,  here’s the thing man from North Carolina, make sure when you are using a fake bill at Walmart, it isn’t a million dollar note because the US mint don’t print such a thing. Hmm, and besides, who has friggin change. Michael Anthony Fuller spent $476 worth of goods before handing over the Walmart cashier the phony $1 million bill, they in turn called the cops and he was promptly arrested.

Psst Note to future forgers, the US mint stop printing anything larger than$100 in 1969.


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Uncategorized, Well I Never

Never Deny a Man Toilet Paper

A man from Charlotte, North Carolina, who couldn’t wipe his bum because there was no toilet paper in his hotel room got all postal and caused $2,000 worth of damage. Shit!


Filed under Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never, Whoops!

First Date Fail

You know what I hate? When you are going out on a first date and you accidentally shoot yourself with your gun. I really friggin hate that. The couple from North Carolina had just finished a meal when the guy got into his car and kaboom, right through his leg.


Filed under I'm Just Saying !, That's Gotta Hurt, Whoops!

That Could Have Been A Blast

Why is it I never find cool stuff in the crap I buy? Some woman in North Carolina found a live grenade in the drawer of an antique sewing machine she purchased. Yes indeedy, the Seymour Johnson Air force Base Explosive Ordnance Disposal Unit were called in and they confirmed it was a live German grenade from WWI.

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Filed under Friggin Scary, Whoops!

Maybe He Should Have Ask For A Breast?

OK, here’s the thing mister, you don’t go exposing yourself at a North Carolina  fast food joint just because they ran out of chicken legs, have you no pride? Hmm, it’s been alleged that Jason Gross, who was a passenger in car, slowly flashed his penis at a drive thru worker after being told they had no more chicken legs. The employee said Mr Gross swore at her then declared he had a  “leg for you” before slowly revealing his genitals. Hmm, she then went on to say  “It’s going to be forever ingrained in my head.” Ain’t that the truth!


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Gross, Well I Never