Tag Archives: Northland beach

Spider Bites Tourist’s Penis

Stop ya bitching, I thought it was a friggin corn dog!

OK people, you might want to think twice about skinny dipping at Northland beach in New Zealand. Hmm, seems a skinny dipping Canadian tourist got bitten on his penis by a venomous katipo spider. Ewh ouch. The tourist isn’t sure when or where he got fanged but after going for a swim in the nude he fell asleep in the sand dunes and awoke to find an enormously swollen dick. No Loons, I know what you are thinking but he also suffered from a nasty red mark on his “shaft”, muscle pains, fever, headache and vomiting. The next morning he was still suffering from chest pains and heart palpitations so he got himself to hospital where he was given anti-venom. Meanwhile the spider was seen gargling with mouth wash!

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