Tag Archives: octopus

Sex Cancelled Due To Cannibalism Fears

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How did I miss this Craig?
OMG, poor Kong saved himself a bucket load of embarrassment after the Seattle Aquarium cancelled his Valentine’s Day mating session in front of visitors. Yes, every year on Valentine’s Day people can view octopus sex. Yep, you heard me, octopus sex. Tentacles thrashing everywhere!!!! But unfortunately for Kong, he was too big for the lovely lady octopuses and staff  feared Kong might eat them, as he is more than double their size. However, there was relief all around as  Kong lived to see another day…. evidently an octopus dies soon after sex. Go Kong!!!!

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife, Well I Never

What Do Get An Octopus That Has Everything?

A coconut shell of course ….

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife

Paul The Psychic Octopus Is Dead

RIP

OMG, Paul the psychic octopus who predicted the World Cup results is dead. He was found floating in his aquarium in Germany last night. A devastated general manager of Sea Life said “He won all our hearts, and we will sorely miss him.”  The body will remain in cold storage until they work out a fitting send off for the lovable 8 legged rogue.

Psst I hope his tentacles don’t end up on eBay!

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Filed under End Credit, Friggin Wildlife

Paul The Octopus Is A Legend

Who would have thought an eight legged sea creature would have been the highlight of this year’s World Cup? Paul the octopus, who up until now only predicted the outcome of German matches, successfully chose Spain over the Netherlands to win the World Cup final and he didn’t disappoint. Attaboy Paul, that’s  3000-1 odds. During the match, which saw a record 14 yellow cards, Spanish fans chanted Paul’s name. I wouldn’t be surprised if he is declared their national hero.

Psst Mani the parrot, you’re full of shit !

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Filed under Friggin Awesome, Friggin Wildlife, Well I Never

Paul The Octopus Says Spain Will Win World Cup

That friggin octopus has been at it again and this time he has predicted Spain will win the World Cup. Hmm, this should be interesting because Mani the parrot says Netherlands. Someone’s lying!

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

World Cup’s Biggest Loser

OMG, while Paul the friggin psychic octopus basks in his friggin prediction glory, a British man is wondering where the hell it all went wrong after he placed the biggest World Cup bet in history, a half a million pounds, on Germany beating Spain.

Psst Well look on the bright side, you have broken two records, biggest bet, biggest loser! It’s all good!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, Sore Loser, Thanks For Nothing, That's Gotta Hurt, Whoops!

That Friggin Octopus Predicts Spain Will Beat Germany

Remember the dumbassed octopus oracle Paul, who has been correctly predicting the outcome of the World Cup matches from his tank in Sea Life, Germany? Well, the friggin sea creature is now predicting Germany is going to lose to Spain.

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife, I'm Just Saying !, Join the skeptic club!, Well I Never

Octopus Oracle Paul Predicts World Cup Winner

Wanna know who’s going to win the World Cup? Well, if Octopus oracle Paul is to be believed, it will be Germany over Argentina. Octopus oracle Paul has become quite a legend at the Sea Life aquarium in Oberhausen, western Germany having predicted correctly all four of Germany’s games.

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife, Join the skeptic club!, Well I Never

Mugged by an Octopus

If you go into the sea today, you’re sure of a big surprise…yeah, a big scary friggin clepto stealing octopus.Victor Huang was in New Zealand testing out his new digital video camera when this techno savvy friggin Octo shot out of some kelp, grabbed his arm , ripped the camera from out of his hands and took then off with his new toy (with a stunned Mr Huang hotly in pursuit). Damn dumbassed sea creature! When he eventually caught up with the thug, he had to use his spear gun to prise the friggin camera from it’s mouth. Not to be outsmarted the octopus then grab the gun. WTF, Pus in the Hood?

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Filed under Friggin Awesome, Friggin Hilarious, Friggin Wildlife, Whoops!