Tag Archives: Oprah

Better Than Winning Lotto

Set another place at the table

We break into normal transmission to announce Oprah has discovered she has a secret half sister. Yep, seems Oprah’s mommy put Patricia up for adoption almost 50 years ago and didn’t tell no one. Man, it’s like finding out you’re related to Santa!

11 Comments

Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never, You Go Girl!

Not The Friggin Mamee Doll

How long do we have to hide?

Note to self, don’t be sending Oprah no “Mamee” washer woman doll as a welcome pressie to Down Under. Seems Ms O isn’t all that fond of golliwogs. The Dafel Dolls and Bears shop in Melbourne has been asked to remove their Mamee dolls from its display to avoid offending Oprah or members of her mobile audience. Might want to hide the Noddy books too while you’re at it.Harry Connick wasn’t available for comment.

10 Comments

Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Well I Never, Whoops!

One Way To Get Attention

Anyone remember Bethany Storro the woman who claimed a black woman threw acid in her face outside a Starbucks? No? Come on she was scheduled to appear on Oprah, you must know her,she’s the one with the severe burns to her face. Oh well anywho, seems like she’s been fibbing. No one threw acid at her, she did it herself.I know, that’s friggins stupid! . But evidently after all the worldwide attention her story attracted she has confessed that her injuries were self inflicted. Sheez!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, I'm Just Saying !, That's Gotta Hurt, Well I Never, Whoops!

Oprah Down Under

Oh fuck, Oprah is coming Down Under, quick, do the dishes and make your beds people! Seems she thinks the Opera House was named in her honor! Fuck,  and she is bringing a plane load of studio audience. Good lord, has anyone told her the  hair weave may melt in December? Fuck, fuck, fuck we just aren’t ready for this type of thing. I hope her lover, Gayle Steadman, isn’t coming. Hmm, we better hide the lamingtons and the Ice VoVos. I’ll have the Vegemite at the ready, that should sending her packing. Hell, have we got time to teach Gillard to speak proper English? FUCK!

15 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Rumor Mill Round Up

Mia Farrow inadvertently bitch slapped Naomi Campbell over some itsy bitsy blood diamonds misunderstanding, a Jonas brother is suing a blogger over suggestions he is having an affair with a 17 year old (he should be thanking him), Oprah’s being sued for Multiple Sclerosis discrimination (halo slip), Fantasia attempts suicide after being outed as the “other” woman and Kelsey Grammer (Frasier) is rumored to have knocked up his airline hostess girlfriend during a middle life crisis.

18 Comments

Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Oprah Nearly Had a Blast

Move on, nothing to see here. The backpack outside Harpo Productions’s (Yep, Oprah’s joint) which was believed to have wires hanging out of it, raised enough alarm bells for the Chicago Bomb and Arson Unit to investigate. But it was soon determined that the suspicious backpack, which was found in the flowerbed, turned out to be just a suspicious backpack in the flowerbed. It’s the weekend people, slow news day!

10 Comments

Filed under Friggin Scary, Well I Never