Tag Archives: panic

Epic Scare


Attention people of Hawaii. Get out of your bomb shelters, storm drains, cupboards and caves, there is no ballistic missile heading your way. Whoops, we bad? Seems a Government worker accidentally sent a phone warning to Smart phone users, scaring the sh*t out of them. It didn’t help that the  message said “ this is not  a drill ,seek immediate shelter” all in capital letters. It also didn’t help that it took 40 minutes to retract the message. The streets soon filled with people crying and screaming. One parent was seen shoving his kid down a manhole. Oh the humanity.

PSST Apparantly the man who activated  the text is feeling bad.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Whoops!

Yeah, About that Emergency Alert

What could possibly go wrong with the National Emergency Alert System ? A hacker sending thousands of New Jersey residents an extreme alert text informing them to “seek shelter immediately” due to the “extreme threat to life”, that’s what! Everybody panic!!!! Residents in the Monmouth and Ocean counties were left friggin freaking, wondering what the hell it could be, while someone, somewhere was having a good old giggle. New Jersey Homeland Security later tweeted that there was  no friggin emergency…as you were. Hmm, great help for those already barricaded  in underground bunkers, huddled in the brace position .



Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

The Latest Pill Panic

Try this

Oh for crying out loud people, stop buying friggin radiation pills. How many times do I have to say it, the disaster is in Japan, not America or Canada. Health agencies in California and Canada are warning people to stop buying potassium iodide as it’s “not a radiation antidote in general.” The fear that radiation could reach their shores and the fact no one believes a word any government says, has caused a mini-panic. One company has already sold out of 10,000 14 pill packs. Anywho, before you rush off to join the panic,  the tablets are solely designed to shield the thyroids from radioactive iodine. In other words IT BLOCKS NO OTHER TYPE OF RADIATION NOR PROTECTS ANY OTHER BODY PART. Oh and if you are over 40 you’re screwed, it won’t help ya! So if you are that concerned I suggest you ring up any old nuclear power plant near you and ask if they have any spare radiation suits.


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Festival Ends In Tragedy

What the hell type of festival leaves 345 people dead? Ask the organizers of Water Festival in Phnom Penh! Between 2-4  million people were attending the event when a suspension bridge crossing to an island began to sway. Cue panic and a stampede. It didn’t help that police began spraying a friggin water cannon at the people to get them to move off the bridge, nor that the bridge was covered in electric lights. Zap!  Electrocution and suffocation are believed to be the main cause of death. Cambodian Prime Minister said “This is the biggest tragedy since the Pol Pot regime,”

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, End Credit, I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing

Charred Grill



Don’t panic, your sheep that burst into flames and incinerated in northern Jordan was not the result of an impending volcanic eruption. No silly, it was just a methane gas leak from a waste treatment plant, no cause for alarm! A shepherd who let his flock wander onto the rocky depression in search of grass said he saw his flock “burn and completely disappear”. Can you smell the lambs, Clarice?


Filed under Friggin Scary, Friggin Wildlife, Whoops!