Tag Archives: penis

Willygate

The moral of the story is to always check diligently over any High School Yearbooks before they go to print. OK, check it a few times, get other people to check it, for crying out loud these are friggin teens and they will do anything to get attention….ANYTHING. Unfortunately, a British school did not heed this advice and are now currently recalling all their yearbooks. Seems a brave lad whipped out his willy during a group shot, which embarrassingly , for him, was not noticed until after the yearbook was printed and some of his mates tweeted the photo.

willy gate

8 Comments

Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Whoops!

Robbed and Penis Whipped

sleeping 2Could your day get any worse?  A woman not only had to deal with the trauma of a home invasion but also the humiliation of being slapped around the face by one of the robber’s penis. No, I haven’t made it up. The two men confronted the owner outside the house before entering and confronting the owner’s daughter-in-law who was asleep in her bedroom. They put a gun to her head and demanded money. When she said she didn’t have any, one of the dude’s whipped out his penis and began slapping her around the face with it yelling ‘Bitch give me the money.’  Good gracious, who knows where that has been  …. not enough soap in the world  😦  . Anywho, , they eventually left penniless but took two TVs on the way out. Seems they may have followed her after she took out money from a ATM earlier.

 

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Gross

Johnson Knob Censored

Come on show us the knob!!!

Come on show us the knob!!!

A newspaper in Johnson City won’t let readers see a 4 inch knob. Oh come on loons a “tree” knob.  Seems  the maple tree suddenly sprung a penis shaped knob  but the newspaper decided to blur the photo when they ran the story . The 88 year old owner of the tree said “I’ve mowed around that tree for a long time, and never did I notice that thing. But it’s there, plain as the nose on your face.”

Psst Johnson City bwahahahahahaha

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Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never

Most Painful Ride Home EVER

doctor_rushing_patient_on_gurney_lg_whtDude where’s your penis? A man in China, who cut his penis off  because he thought he would never find love ,  forgot to bring it with him to the hospital when he had second thoughts. Awkward. What makes this story even worse was the mean docs at the hospital told him to get back on his bicycle and ride home to get it. By the time he returned they said it was too late to save it. Hmm, how accurate is the Daily Star reporting, just saying?

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under Sore Loser, That's Gotta Hurt

Might Want To Avoid The Toast

Man gets penis caught in toasterThe London Fire Brigade have asked the public to take extra care when using appliances after they were called to assist a man who got his penis caught in a toaster. No word on whether it was on at the time. Anywho the firefighters say QUIT IT!!! Seems ever since the release of Fifty Shades the British fire firefighters have been extra busy removing people from compromising positions.

8 Comments

Filed under Whoops!

Special Delivery

Man exposes himself through mail slotSome perv in Sweden has been arrested after he followed a woman home and then stuck his penis through the mail slot in her door. The dude fled like a jack rabbit when she opened it (no, the door silly).  Luckily he didn’t do that at my place or Claudius would have had a ball (pun intended).

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Gross

A Snake You Say?

Snake bites man on penis Samuel L Jackson, Samuel L Jackson to the Haifa restroom, we have snakes in the latrine. An Israeli man was admitted to hospital after he was bitten on the penis by a snake while taking a leak in a public toilet. Hmm, the snake either jumps very well or the dude has very short legs or …oh never mind.

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife, That's Gotta Hurt

Lubricant Disfigures Penis

No honey, it isn't suppose to be that big

No honey, it isn’t suppose to be that big

Oh dear, a Philadelphia man is suing The Kama Sutra Co. and Kamsut Inc. for allegedly making his penis burn and swell after he applied their lubricating and desensitizing gel, resulting in permanent disfigurement and loss of sensation. Ouch. 

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, That's Gotta Hurt

Penis Flashing Political Flyer

Oh for crying out loud Mr MP, make sure you check your flyers before sending them to 50,000  Brisbane voters … I’m just saying. Andrew Laming had to send an apology after it was pointed out to him, that a man in one of the “Australia Day Celebration” photos on the flyer was flashing his penis. The man in the photo will be left even more red faced after Mr Laming said he was recalling the brochures due to  a “really tiny” detail.

Photo of man flashing in political flyer

 

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Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Whoops!

Sex With Snowman Ends in Frostbite

Man gets frostbite on penis after having sex with snowmanOne of the main reasons you don’t have sex with a snowman when you’re drunk is that you could get frostbite on your dick. Hey Duncan, are you OK? The 64 year old man was admitted to the hospital screaming in pain after screwing the 5ft snowman.  Residents in Blackburn are fuming that “He left a pile of empty bottles, a wrecked snowman and a trail of frozen man-juice in the middle of the community recreation ground.”

Want sauce with that?

9 Comments

Filed under Sore Loser, That's Gotta Hurt