Tag Archives: pistol

Van Gogh Killed By Two Boys

Well go stick a pin in art history Steven Naifeh and Gregory White Smith. The two authors are claiming Vincent Van Gogh did not kill himself, I repeat, did not kill himself but rather was shot dead by two local kids with a malfunctioning pistol. The great painter, who was a tad loopy, was thought to have shot himself in the chest before walking a mile to get help while living in the village of Auvers-sur-Oise  in France . But the new claim suggests he was accidentally shot.  Hmm, and that would make him still dead.

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Filed under Join the skeptic club!

Pain In The Butt

And this weeks “accidentally shooting yourself in the backside” award goes to Johnathan Hartman. Police allege Hartman stuck  a pistol in his girlfriend’s mouth before sticking it down the back of his pants and driving off. At some stage while he was driving it went kaboom right into his bum. That’s gotta hurt.

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Filed under That's Gotta Hurt, Whoops!

Christmas Cracker!

At least now you know what to get him for Christmas

Bear with me people, this story is a tad complicated. Brett Aaron Sanford was arrested after he was found hiding under a mattress in the home he shares with his girlfriend and his mother (just setting the scene). Sanford is accused of a lot of things, firstly stealing a blow-up doll and then secondly for instigating a disturbance at a convenience store later in the day. In the convenience store incident he changed into a woman’s tracksuit while stealing a .22-caliber pistol (yes, see, I told you). He then went back to the Theater X Adult Super Center where he had stolen the blow-up doll and waved the gun around and behaved rather oddly. While he was making his getaway he managed to sideswipe a trailer and fled into a wooded area (geez, lucky he stole those woman’s trackie daks).That’s when police found the blow-up doll and his driver’s license. Sanford’s girlfriend was also arrested for goddam lying to police about his whereabouts. No word on whether his mom was home at the time.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Hilarious, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never