Tag Archives: president obama

Beam Me Up Obama

You heard me, go cause a global financial crisis NOW!!!

You heard me, go cause a global financial crisis NOW!!!

Still wondering why Edward Snowden is hiding out in Russia? Well, according to an Iranian newspaper it’s because the whistleblower has “incontrovertible” proof that space aliens have been controlling Washington since 1945. Yes, you heard me since 1945. Hmm, might explain Jimmy Carter , Ronald Reagan and the Bushes. Evidently, these extraterrestrial have been living in the Nevada desert but pulling strings in Washington. President Obama is a mere figurehead , with the aliens running US domestic and international policy….. which would explain  AlienObamaCare.

Want sauce with that?

5 Comments

Filed under They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

What?

Who are you?

Who are you?

I have always wondered how many deaf people actually watch the person doing sign language during important events but now I know … a lot, especially at the Nelson Mandela memorial service. Seems they picked up pretty much straight away that the man next to President Obama doing strange hand movements was actually a fake or a really, really bad interpreter. Twitter came to life when deaf people around the world realized he was just flapping his arms around and making it all up. Most tweets went something like this “It was horrible, an absolute circus, really really bad, Only he can understand those gestures.” So far no one has identified the interpreter and the South African government is tight lipped.

Psst Maybe the guy just didn’t understand what President Obama was saying.

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Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Whoops!

Obama Lookalike Cast As Satan

Coincidence? Seems many of the 13.1 million viewers of the History Channel’s tv series, The Bible, thought the devil looked remarkably like President Obama. What ya think?

Psst Ironically no one was the slight bit upset that the show represented “Satan” as a black man. Ah, how the times are a changing.

OK, he kinda has his eyes.

OK, he kinda has his eyes.

10 Comments

Filed under Whoops!

Spider Named After Obama

Trapdoor spider named after President Obama

Better than Mittius Romneyai I guess

Ooh lucky President Obama, he’s just had a trapdoor spider named after him … Aptostichus barackobamai. This newly discovered species are very secretive , hide in underground burrows and have  a silk trapdoor. Hmm, I wonder if they migrated from Kenya…just saying.

Psst I bet they can be found in a fiscal cliff?

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife, Well I Never

Hell, This is Obama, Get Tebow on the Line

OK here’s the thing, pretending to be President Obama when making repeated 911 calls in an attempt to speak with New York Jets quarterback Tim Tebow, is just going to get you an arresting. Oh and throwing your summons on the ground after being released, that’s an additional summons for littering. Have a nice day.

3 Comments

Filed under Friggin Dumbass

Clearwater Bowling Alley Not Amused

A Florida Bowling Alley in Clearwater has been receiving some  unwanted attention over a viral email that suggests they have placed President Obama’s face at the end of their bowling lanes, making it look like the pins are his teeth. The email says that the Countryside Lanes bowling alley has been making a killing over the gimmick, with people flocking to the place for a chance to knock Obama’s teeth out. As you can imagine the staff are sick and tired of answering the phone to deny the whole thing.

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Filed under Friggin Wrong, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Iraq War Is Officially Over

President Obama today has officially ended the war in Iraq and all troops will be home before Christmas. Hmm, hang on wasn’t the war suppose to be in Afghanistan? Ah, whatever, 40,000 soldiers (men and women) are coming home. With this announce please don’t forget the thousands upon thousands who lot their lives on BOTH sides since the war began in 2003.

Psst Sheez, the US economy must be really bad.

1 Comment

Filed under Friggin Awesome, I'm Just Saying !

Were The Royal Family Informed?

Color me cynical but I did raise an eyebrow when the Royal Family announced that Prince William would be delaying his honeymoon. I thought agents may have been worried that there was a  plot afoot to ruin his fairytale. Hmm, I’m now guessing the MI5 got wind of the US mission to bump off Osama Bin Laden and didn’t want the future King of England to be gallivanting overseas in the aftermath. Could this also be the real reason while president Obama was not invited to the Royal Wedding? Hello, what a perfect time to strike, when half the world were watching the nuptials !

4 Comments

Filed under I'm Just Saying !

Now What?

It took 18 days of protesting  for Mubarak to  resign as Pres but he did. People power has prevailed and Egypt is now free to pursue a democratic system of government. Bye bye dictator, tribal council have spoken and you have been given  the raised shoe! Ooh and they have frozen your assets. President Obama praised the people in a carefully worded speech following the announcement  “For Egypt, it was the moral force of non-violence, not terrorism, not mindless killing, but non-violence, moral force, that bent the arc of history towards justice once more.” Hmm, but the big question for Egypt and the rest of the world is …now what?

Psst So is Mubarak going to bunking with ousted Tunisia President?

10 Comments

Filed under Friggin Awesome, I'm Just Saying !

Teen Banned From The US For Life

OK here’s the thing Luke Angel, don’t be sending President Obama an email calling him a prick, that’s a banning from America for life! Sheez, you would think the CIA would have more pressing matters than to chase down a friggin 17 year old from England but no they did and now he’s on that US Department of Homeland Security bad peoples list.Way to go Luke.  The email was sent after the teen, who claims he was drunk at the time, watched a program about 9/11. Hmm, so I’m guessing it was obama@hotmail.com?

Psst I bet it was Michelle’s doing!

2nd Psst Hmm, what the hell is a 17 year old doing drunk? Ban his sorry ass from all the Islamic countries too!!!!

6 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Hilarious, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never