Tag Archives: radiation

Epic Telco Fail

Cell phoneAustralian phone company Telstra scared the beegezus out of its mobile phone customers by sending them a text warning on how to reduce exposure to electromagnetic energy .OMG, no!!! Some people freaked. No one wants to think the phone in their pocket is nuking their ….oh never mind. The text contained a link which sent customers to a World Health Organisation tips page about how to “reduce mobile phone exposure”. Hmm, if I was a suspicious Loon, I would be thinking they know something and are covering their asses before the electromagnetic energy hits the fan!!!

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Filed under Friggin Scary

Europe is Aglow

No need to panic just yet but OMG,  low levels of  radiation have been detected across Europe over the past few days. More concerning is the trace of iodine-131, which is a radiation associated with a leaky nuclear reactor or the detonation of nuclear weapon. So far no one knows the origin of the leak or which country it is coming from. Run people, run!!!!

Psst Hmm, maybe it’s  China’s way of effectively cleaning up Europe’s financial mess?????

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Filed under Friggin Scary, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

What The Hell Are In Those Bottles?

No really, everything's fine!

No need to panic good people of Japan, but it seems the radiation levels in a small area around Tokyo’s Setagaya ward are higher than those around Fukushima. Officials searching for the source found several glass bottles in a cardboard box in someone’s basement which sent the radiation detectors into a friggin fit. Oh, but don’t worry, the local government says there is nothing to worry about and the radiation poses no immediate health threat. Well, that’s alright then!

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Japan, Friggin Scary

Good Grief Not The Beef!

Crap!

OK loons, you might want to put own your glowing green tea for a sec I got some more bad news, high radiation levels have been found in Fukushima cattle. Hmm, well at least they’ll be able to see their hamburgers in the dark!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Japan, Well I Never

Step Away From The Green Tea

OMG, it’s bad enough bunnies are being born without ears but when Japan’s green tea is contaminated with friggin radiation…everybody panic. Hmm, yes Japan’s biggest growing tea area, the Shizuoka prefecture, is reeling after high levels of radiation were recorded from this year’s first harvest.  The scary part is the radiation was found by accident after a mail order Tokyo company had it privately tested. Authorities fear contaminated tea may have already gone to market, which wouldn’t be so bad if it wasn’t for the fact around 42% of Japan’s green tea comes from the Shizoka area. Green tea is to Japan what Champagne is to France. Needless to say the tea growers are friggin furious, not to mention the Loon, who drinks copious amounts of imported Japanese Gyokuro green tea.

 

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Japan, Friggin Scary

Earless Bunny Panic

OK loons, no need to panic but WTF, an earless rabbit has  been born near Japan’s Fukushima nuclear plant!  Oh no, could it be  the land of the rising mutants? Maybe the rapture HAS began?

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Japan, Friggin Scary

Bigger Than Chernobyl

OK, no one panic, but you know things are bad when Japan orders the world’s largest pump to spray concrete on Fukushima ‘s out of control radioactive rods. To make matters worse nuclear experts are claiming the Fumushima nuclear reactor disaster leaves the Chernobyl one for dead (pardon the pun) and may result in a rewrite of the international scale used to measure the severity of atomic accidents. Dr John Price thinks it could take a hundred friggin years to cool the nuclear rods before they can be removed. Worse still are the rumors the Samurai 50 will all die from radiation sickness within weeks.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Scary

Really?

America halts the import of all dairy products and produce that come from anywhere friggin near Japan’s leaking nuclear reactor.

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Honey, Why Are You Glowing?

Hmm, might want to avoid the tap water in Japan now that it’s tainted with radiation. The water near the Fukushima plant has been tested and it was found to contain iodine and cesium but not to worry, the government says the levels are too small to pose any immediate health risk. Oh, well that’s OK then!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Japan, Friggin Scary

Honey, Why Are You Glowing?

Sorry sir, all glowing passengers to economy!

No need for panic people, but several passengers have registered higher than normal radiation levels after arriving in South Korea and Taiwan from flights out of Japan. Sheez, that could just be from the X-Ray machines! Anywho, seems the radiation was only on their clothing and they were showing no ill effects. Reports are also coming in that passengers set off radiation detectors at O’Hare Airport. Good lord, imagine, radioactive airplanes! As if the food wasn’t bad enough!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Scary, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never