Tag Archives: scientists

Stay Sober Pill

There goes all the fun!

OMG, close your eyes Duncan, you don’t want to read this. Aussie and American scientists are developing a “stay sober” pill. Yes indeedy, you can drink and drink and drink and not get a wee bit tipsy. This can not possibly end well!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Asteroids Got a Bum Wrap!

Who friggin cares!!!!

Well, well, well, seems the asteroids have been the innocent victims in the whole dinosaur extinction argument. NASA scientists are now debunking the theory that asteroids crashed into Earth 65 million years ago, annihilating the dinosaurs. Calling Lily Rush, Lily Rush to the front counter please. Yep, it seems they all got it wrong. The Baptisina asteroid, which has always been seen as the guilty party, broke up closer to 80 million years ago  instead of the 160 million years previously thought. Which means it had an alibi!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Human’s Can Soon Spray Their Territory Too

Here’s a conversation you can bring up at your next dinner party. Scientists in Australia are analyzing Dingo wee in an attempt to produce an artificial version to keep them away from livestock. Everyone knows dogs and cats use their urine to mark their territory right? It’s a kind of warning to other animals to stay the hell out of my hood. So anywho, scientists have been collecting dingo urine to work out which chemicals are the deterrent. Once that’s sorted, you ,farmers or anyone else who has wild dog issues can buy dingo piddle to spray around your property to keep them out. It’s like a reverse strategy, YOU become the one marking your territory.

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Filed under Friggin Awesome, Friggin Wildlife, Well I Never

What Could Possibly Go Wrong?

We all know that cows and sheep let off methane emissions when they burp and fart but scientists have discovered that wallabies only release one fifth of the amount. Reason?  They have a bacteria in their bellies that reduce emissions. Yep, you know where this is heading.  They want to go to the laboratory  and see if they can develop a similar bacteria for cows and sheep.  Check the title of my blog post for my reaction.

Psst I wonder if I could use that bacteria for my grandma? She could start a car with her…ah never mind!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Scary, Well I Never

Something Fishy About These Balls

Blahaha lobster balls, aren't they too small to hit?

Scientists from the Maine University have invented a golf ball made entirely out of lobster shells, making them biodegradable. You know what this means loons? Yes, golf is back on cruise ships! Since 1991 it has been illegal for anyone to pollute the oceans with golf balls thanks to some friggin treaty but now we have “Lob-shots”, golf is back on the high seas. Oh and the Greenies should be happy because normally crustacean shells end up as landfill but now they can  go back from whence they came as ocean fill! Oh and if you were wondering, the balls are strong enough to withstand a good whack from an iron or driver and will take about a week to break up in water. Hmm, I wonder how much funding they received for this project?

Psst Still no cure for cancer!

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Filed under Friggin Awesome, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

I’m Not Having That It My Coffee

What's wrong with your own milk lady?

Oh crap, scientists have been messing with cows again. Yep, the latest genetically modified breakthrough is cows that produce “human” breast milk. Seriously I kid you not, they have bred 300 cows that had been given human genes to make their milk contain the same nutrients and fat content as human breast milk. Yuk! What could possibly go wrong?

Psst Why can’t human just leave nature well alone?

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Gross, Friggin Scary, Friggin Wildlife, Friggin Wrong

Genetically Modified Super Chook

Well I'll be clucked!

My, my, British scientists believe they have created a genetically modified “superchicken” that won’t spread the bird flu. Bravo, now where’s your cure for cancer?

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Filed under Friggin Scary, Friggin Wildlife, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Those Friggin Insane Clown Posse

OK Loons, most of you are probably not familiar with rappers of Insane Clown Posse or their hugely successful hit Miracles (or as it is now referred “F***ing Magnets: How Do They Work?”. Well, they have managed to pissed off the science community who fear it was all an elaborate plot to discredit them….

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Filed under Friggin Hilarious, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

We Are Not Alone!!!!

Oh crap, scientists believe they have found signs of life on Saturn’s moon. Yes, Titan, Saturn’s biggest moon, might have primitive alien lifeforms living off the fuel on its surface and breathing in the crap from its atmosphere. Sheez, I hope they don’t want to come to Earth and live, as if we don’t have enough mouths to feed and our health system is already overloaded without having them getting free medicals too! Imagine having to protect our atmospheric boarders (Arizona would have a fit!). OK, one big  bummer for the alien life form is scientists believe they are probably methane-based (we are water based), which mean no intergalactic  relationships ladies!!!!  Hmm, which may also explain why so many cows have been abducted? Anywho, you can read all the scientific gobbledygook here USA Today.

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Filed under Evolution Be Damned!, I'm Just Saying !, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

Everybody Panic!!!!!

WTF, Feds are now so friggin desperate to stop the oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico they have pulled in James Cameron for special talks. Yes, you heard me right,Avatar director James friggin Cameron is among a select group of scientists and other experts meeting with officials to brainstorm . Sheez, unless they plan to pipe Celine Dion music down there in the hope the oil will retreat, they might as well call in Chuck Norris and MacGyver while they are at it. OK Loons, I guess it’s up to us, got any ideas?

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Join the skeptic club!, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never, Whoops!