Tag Archives: snakes

Snakes Alive

Feet up Aussies, seems the early hot weather means male snakes are coming out of hibernation and mating sooner than expected. It’s on. Snakes will be on the prowl for a missus. They will be angry little reptiles ready to rumble with any other male snake they come across in their pursuit of a female. Pet owners have been urged to be a lot more vigilant as some of Australia’s most deadliest snakes will take no prisoners in their once a year mating ritual.

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife, They Live Among Us !

Don’t Rattle Them

Well this is one of my worst nightmares….. a pit of rattlesnakes. What the!!!!  Some guy was filming the tangled mess of slither when his GoPro dropped into the nest.  Dear god, just run. No seriously, count your loses and run.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Wildlife

Snakes Alive and Owner Not So

Mayan Pyramid BulldozedOh for the love of …. a man reported missing in Germany was found dead in his home surround by 40 friggin enormous snakes. Experts believe the only reasons the snakes didn’t make a meal of him was he was too big to swallow whole and they like eating their prey alive. Oh, dear lord..eek. The man is believed to have died of a heart attack while feeding his slimy creatures.

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Filed under Friggin Scary, Friggin Wildlife

Snakes Alive In Hospital

What the hell was that

What the hell was that?

Feet up patients in a Saskatchewan hospital, you got snakes. Over a hundred of the slimy reptiles have been found slithering around the basement and wards since February. Officials say they are harmless little garter snakes but you might want to sleep with one eye open anyways.

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife

Mom, Can We Keep Them?

Deadly snakes hatch in boys bedroomYou know what I hate ? When a three year old finds a nest of eggs in his yard, carts them to his room and puts them in a container in his wardrobe only to have them hatch out a clutch of …. seven baby eastern brown snakes (one of the most venomous species in the world). His mother discovered the hatchlings after opening his wardrobe and spying them squirming around inside the container.  An Aussie wildlife expert  said the family were lucky the boy didn’t play with them because the darn things are extremely aggressive and are pretty much deadly.

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Filed under Friggin Scary, Friggin Wildlife

Two Crates of Snakes In A SUV

Boo!

You know what I hate? When you carjack a man in a SUV, shoot him and take his wheels only to discover the 2 boxes next to you contain friggin snakes. That’s an exit stage left right there. The carjacker, who evidently realized he was in a car with way too many ball pythons crashed into a pole, jumped from the car, threw two handguns into the bush and ran like hell. Hmm, last time he’ll be doing  that!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Wildlife, Well I Never

Honey, I Hope That’s You!

Someone looking for a really, really, really cheap house in Idaho? Hello, five bedroom for $109,000!! One catch. It has a small snake problem. OK, a big friggin snake problem. The entire house is infested with garter snakes. Come on people, garter snakes are harmless.  OK, they like slithering in the ceilings and between walls but they don’t bite. That’s gotta be a bonus, right? Anywho, the house is on the market after the previous owners fled and the price has been slashed by $65,000. A Pest inspector estimates there are thousands of snakes living in the house. Reason? The house was built on a snake den. Phew, least it wasn’t built on an Indian burial site!

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Filed under Friggin Scary, Friggin Wildlife, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Snakes On Friggin Planes

Pasta or chicken?

You know what I hate? When you are waiting for your luggage at the  airport conveyor belt when suddenly someone’s bag bursts open releasing 95 live boa constrictors. I really friggin hate that! Keng Liang “Anson” Wong was arrested after he tried to smuggle the reptiles out of Kuala Lumpur International airport and scared the shit out of travelers.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Scary, Friggin Wildlife, Whoops!

Can You Hear Something Rustling?

Don’t mess with Chinese brothers Guo Gongwei and Guo Gongtian if you know what’s good for you.They have been arrested for releasing 500 poisonous snakes near the home of the village leader, known as Song, because of a feud. Seems they thought it was the best form of revenge. No shit Sherlock, feet up!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Wildlife, Friggin Wrong, Well I Never

No Garden Of Eden!

Homeless man starts fire to rid camp of snakes

What the hell was that?

Dude, pouring gasoline all over your campsite and igniting it ain’t gonna rid the place of snakes, burn the friggin woods down , but won’t  rid the place of  snakes. Gerald Raymond Collett, a homeless man from Des Moines, was arrested after his snake phobia got the better of him… that’s a reckless use of fire charge right there! Snakes 1, Homeless dude 0.

Psst What’s with the friggin snakes?

2nd Psst I did a quick search of snakes in Des Moines and it seems they do have snakes but most are harmless!

 

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Filed under Denial, Friggin Wildlife, Well I Never