Tag Archives: south africa

Cape Fear

Cape Town is about to face the worst natural disaster in their history. In a hundred days the modern African city will have no water. Zip, zero, nada. A drought has all but dwindled the city’s water supply.  The reservoir that supplies two thirds of water  to its 4 million residents is nearly dry as a bone. Within a few weeks the water levels will be so low the water will not be able to flow through the pipes. If  “Day Zero” arrives all taps will be turned off.  It is a scary thought. Without water it is feared there will be pure mayhem as people fight for what little water is left. Businesses relying on water have already began laying off people. This is going to be one hell of a nightmare domino effect.

How could this happen? Ask their so-called government. Mis-management and the usual political denial has lead a modern city to the brink.


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Filed under Uncategorized

Mick Fanning One Lucky Bastard

There is nothing like live TV to capture your worst nightmare. Aussie legend Mick Fanning was attacked by a shark during a South African surfing event as the cameras were on him. Fortunately he was able to Chuck Norris the beast.


Filed under Friggin Wildlife

Great White Just Messing With Ya

Those great white sharks ….. such kidders. A great white in South Africa decided to pop a rubber boat and then watch the frantic film crew try to make it back to shore without sinking. Made his day.


Filed under Friggin Wildlife

8 Year Old Says I Do With 61 Year Old Woman

My dead relis made me do it. So says the 8 years old who has just tied the knot with a 61 year old woman. South African kid, Sanele Masilela, told his family he was scared to death of his dead ancestors who had told him he had to put a ring on the finger of mother of 5 Helen Shabangu… or else. So, with 100 guests in attendance the pint sized kid, married Helen.

Psst Don’t tell his dead relatives but the marriage isn’t legally binding. Phew.

Want sauce with that?


Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Well I Never

Tuberculosis is Making A Comeback

Cases of untreatable Tuberculosis in South AfricaOK, I hate to be the one to break this to you but doctors in South Africa are trying to fight a ‘Totally Drug-Resistant’ Tuberculosis.  The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention are saying these are the first cases of “virtually untreatable” TB. Oh dear, I feel a little chesty….


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Scary

Crocs On The Loose

15,000 crocodiles on the loose in South AfricaFeet up everyone living near Rakwena Crocodile Farm in South Africa. The flood gates have been opened and there are now 15,000 crocs, yes you heard me, 15,000 crocodiles, on the loose. Thanks to a friggin nasty storm and flooding in the area the reptiles are now free. One poor family who had scrambled to their roof to avoid flood waters found themselves being circled by a big group of them.

Update : Since the news broke,  about half of the crocs have been recaptured,  but it is feared there are about 8,000 still whooping it up in the  Limpopo River. Phew only 8,000, that’s a relief!!!!


Filed under Friggin Scary, Friggin Wildlife

Are We There Yet?

OMG. How many nursery kids can you cram into a Renault Clio? Hmm, well if you are a teacher from South Africa the answer is 19. That’s ten in the back seat, three in the front and six in the trunk. The silly woman was taking her class on an excursion to a burger bar when witnesses dobbed her into police. She told them this was her first time on an outing with the snowflakes.

Wanna see what 19 kids in a car looks like?  Click here.


Filed under Friggin Dumbass, Well I Never

Boxing Legend Corrie Sanders Murdered

The world is mourning the death of South African boxing legend Corrie Sanders (46) who was gunned down while celebrating his nephew’s 21st birthday party at a Pretoria restaurant. The ex heavy weight boxer who won 46 of his 50 bouts was unfortunately the victim of a botched robbery. Witnesses say he was the only one shot when men carrying pistols burst into a restaurant and demanded money and valuables from the customers.
Sports stars have not only expressed words of sympathy over the senseless killing but many have used this opportunity to highlight South Africa’s increasing crime rate.


Filed under End Credit

When Chimpanzees Go Wild

An American University student is in a critical condition in a South African hospital after two chimpanzees grabbed the man’s legs from under a perimeter fence and dragged him into their enclosure. The animal sanctuary houses abused and misplaced chimps. The man was taking a group of people on a tour when the incident happened.


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Wildlife

Was Lord Lucan Living In South Africa?

No shit!

Could the Lord Lucan mystery finally be solved? A woman is claiming that Lord Lucan fled Britain after he became the number one suspect in  the murder of his children’s nanny Sandra Rivett in 1974 and went a hiding in South Africa. The woman, who wants to remain anonymous, claims that Lucan’s gambling buddy the late John Aspinall helped hide him. Aspinall also organized several special trips for Lucan’s kids to visit South Africa (where Lucan saw them but didn’t meet them). OK, loons, don’t hold your breath, there have been numerous false sightings of the elusive Lord over the years, including him being a member of the Mucky Duck Bush Band , an Aussie MP who was also coincidentally was trying to fake his own death, a hippy living in Goa and a Kiwi living in a Land Rover. If this report is correct Lord Lucan died somewhere between the 1990’s-2000.


Filed under Join the skeptic club!, Well I Never