A little word of advice to all would-be thieves, please don’t leave your severed finger behind at the crime scene as the police can and will get a finger print. Seriously, that is common crime sense 101. When a technician found a severed finger in a spool of copper wiring he gave the police a buzz and they ran the print. When they went to arrest the fool ,surprise, surprise he happened to be missing a digit. Oh the humanity.
Tag Archives: theft
The Easter Bunny has been arrested in Ohio. Seems his sticky fingers have got him in hot water. You just can’t go around stealing $1,600 worth of DVDs, even of you are the Easter Bunny. Oh, but don’t worry little snowflakes, the police arrested him after his shift and he’s due in court the day before Easter, so your chocolate eggs should be good to go.
Honey, sweetie, darl, when stealing a frozen bag of shrimp it’s probably not wise to stuff it down your daks. The Pennsylvania man wandered over to the frozen food section of a supermarket and “proceeded to pull the front of his jeans away from his body and deposit one of the bags of shrimp into his crotch area,” Hmm, not a particularly good look. Brian Troy McDaniel then tried to make a run for it but how far can someone run with frozen balls I ask? Oh well, whack retail theft, robbery and simply assault on his bill.