Tag Archives: too fat

Better Late Than Never

Nawww, a married couple who have never had sex because they are too fat are going on a diet so they can have kids. They have been married since 2010.

fat couple

 

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Filed under Well I Never, You Go Girl!

Sorry, You’re Too Fat For Death Row

Put you on a strict diet too huh?

Eat up death row inmates because if you get too fat they ain’t gonna execute you. Well not in Ohio anyways. It seems if you top the scales at 480lbs (218kg) you may have  a “torturous and lingering death.” and therefore can’t be permanently removed from society. Just ask Ronald Post, he’s spent the last 30 years on death row and is now so big they fear they won’t even be able to find a vein let alone squeeze him onto the execution gurney. In an ironic twist Post said he has tried to lose weight but he has a knee and back problem and can’t exercise.

Psst Yeah, yeah one more time loons, Friggin Ohio, home of Bearman.

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Filed under Friggin Ohio Home of Bearman, I'm Just Saying !

Body Left To Rot

Oh no, a UK family is understandably distraught  after the body of David Gardner was allegedly left to rot on a table in a hospital morgue for nearly a week because it was too large to fit into a mortuary fridge. The family were unable to say their goodbyes as the body had decomposed prior to the funeral . An investigation is currently underway.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Well I Never

Sisters Are Doing It For Themselves!

Shouldn't this have been checked first?

OMG, remember those two sisters who were released from prison after 16 year so one could have a kidney transplant and the other could donate the kidney? Yep, them. Well anywho, seems there will be no transplant any time soon because they are both too fat and one has got to give up smoking before a doctor will even look at them. Jamie Scott has to lose 100 lbs and Gladys Scott another 60lbs plus quit smoking before they can  be tested  for compatibility. Well ladies you have a year to do it because that was the condition of release. Hmm, I can see where this is heading.

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never, Whoops!

Even Hedgehogs Need To Watch Their Weight

The Scottish SPCA have put 12 hedgehogs on diets because they are so fat they can’t roll themselves into a ball to protect themselves. I know the feeling!

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Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Friggin Wildlife, How Embarrassing, Whoops!

My Body IS a Friggin Temple

Remember Mayra Rosales, the 1,000lb woman accused of killing her 2 year old nephew after claiming she accidentally fell him on him while babysitting? Come on surely you do? She’s the one who was too fat to be transported to jail. No? OK, well she has slimmed down to 800lb but is still a tad too obese to get into a courtroom to face trial. Defense lawyers are hoping to solve the logistical nightmare so prosecutors can get on with the case. Good luck with that.
Oh and while we are on the subject, Susi Spice covered another similar story of woe. A 350lb plus Cleveland woman recently pleaded guilty to involuntary manslaughter after killing her boyfriend by sitting on him. Dear god, it’s a jungle out there.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

5000 Booted Off Website For Being Too Fat

Jane is now a member of MySpace where no one cares.

Oh shame, 5,000 members of beautifulpeople.com have been removed from the social networking site for stacking on the pounds over Christmas. Hmm, seems the site not only has a ban on ugly people it also has one for the fat ones too. The site allows members to decide who is allowed to join and who should be removed. The tribal council voted and people who appeared to have “let themselves go” and become “festive fatties”  were given the flick. Oh but not to despair, those who were sent packing were emailed a list of fitness centres where they could work off their Christmas trimmings (bless, so caring after all). The founder of the site, Robert Hintz said “Letting fatties roam the site is a direct threat to our business model and the very concept for which BeautifulPeople.com was founded.”

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Filed under Friggin Awesome, Friggin Hilarious, How Embarrassing, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Roger That!

Obese man requires a chinook helicopter to get to hospitalYou know you’re fat when you need a Chinook helicopter to airlift you to hospital. Paul Mason weighs 70 stone, yes that’s right 70 stone, and he desperately needs to get to hospital for weight reducing surgery. The last time he needed to visit hospital they had to remove a neighbor’s wall for the  forklift truck to get close enough to get him out of his house. However, this time he may require the service of the RAF. Good luck with that!

Psst The NHS Suffolk will be footing the bill for his treatment.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Evolution Be Damned!, Friggin Scary, I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing

America’s Next Fat Model

Ralph Lauren model sacked because she was too fat

What is she doing on Biggest Loser?

Bummer. Swedish-French model Filippa Hamilton who is 5’10”, weighs 120 pounds, and wears a size 4 says she has been given her marching orders by Ralph Lauren because…wait for it…she is too fat! Geez, Ralph would really hate me, I don’t think I could get a size 4 over my head! Hmm, maybe if I wear it as a hat and scrunched it up..but anywho I digress. Ooh and poor Filippa got dissed via a letter which read in part “We’re terminating your services because you don’t fit into the sample clothes that you need to wear.” This is the same girl who raised eyebrows after appearing in a controversial ad where her head was bigger than her hips! Photoshopping disaster! Ralph Lauren are denying her sacking had anything to do with her weight. Honey, come and sit on the couch with us and make fun of all the skinny girls. Can someone pass me the pizza!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Denial, I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing, That's Gotta Hurt, You Go Girl!