When the council failed to remove a dead raccoon from a Toronto street, there was only one thing to do…build a shrine to the little fellow. A rose and a sympathy card were soon followed by candles, flowers and even a framed photo of a raccoon. Locals named the deceased critter Conrad and tweeted the memorial.
PSST Conrad was eventually taken to his final resting place by an animal services worker near midnight.
Oh for the love of stupidity, a man who was partying in a vacant store in Toronto got himself stuck in a safe after he was dared to get in it. He was eventually cut out after firefighters were called. Yes, he was drunk, eh.
Where's my Ruffles?
Egads, a prisoner at a Toronto jail killed another inmate by stomping on his head because he stole and ate half his bag of Ruffles potato chips . He then later told other inmates “Nobody punks me off for a bag of chips.”
Oh my,two gay African penguins in the Toronto zoo are being separated during mating season because the girl penguins are getting rather frustrated. The zoo will only put the inseparable Pedro and Buddy back together when they have done the deed with the women. Hmm, that could take awhile! The penguins are part of an endangered species breeding program, which could end up being an epic fail if the guys don’t man-up!
We are the Toronto public and we want to shop. OMG, he’s probably someone’s dad.
You know what I hate? When a Toronto gang use squirt bottles filled with feces to rob people. I really friggin hate that. The gang usually strikes ATM customers after they have just finished withdrawing money.Gross. Here’s how they do it, first, one gang member approaches the victim and sprays them with the feces (believed to be human) then a second gang member approaches to offer assistance to the appalled victim by holding their jacket or purse while they clean themselves. Both then flee with the items. Hmm, sounds like a lot of hard work to me, buy a friggin gun!
Remember that friggin dumbass Raptor mascot who ate the cheerleader? Well he’s back and he’s still a dumbass.