Tag Archives: wedding

Wedding Ruined By Strippers

A Chinese man who hired two strippers for his son’s wedding has been arrested. Zhang Cheng originally wanted to hire a band but one thing lead to another and he ended up hiring the strippers. Unfortunately hundreds of local  villagers got wind of the sexy act and gatecrashed the venue to get a look see. Mr Zhang was arrested the next day but no one is quite sure why. Hmm, maybe they failed the breast breath test?

2 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Well I Never

I Hope It Lasts!

A big shout out to Hazi Abdul Noor who got married this weekend in India. Noor is 120 years of age and his blushing bride is 60. Hmm, I can pretty much guess who will be doing the chores around their place. The wedding was attended by over 500 guests, including Noor’s 6 kids who were estatic their dad has found a new wife. Probably so they don’t have to look after him any more.

1 Comment

Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Royal Wedding Of The Year

Dagnabbit, I missed the Royal Wedding of the year. Yep, 85 year old Duchess of Alba has finally tied the knot with her 61 year old toy boy Alfonso Diez in Spain. Olay, olay. The couple, who have had chins wagging since they announced their engagement, seemed happily in bemused  love as they walked arm and arm from the palace after the ceremony. Oh and if you were thinking he’s just a gold digging rat, the Duchess divided her $4 billion fortune amongst her children and grandchildren before the nupitals (just to be on the safe side).

4 Comments

Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Join the skeptic club!, You Go Girl!

Royal Wedding Review

Yes, the loon watched the Royal Wedding. For some reason I was captivated by Will’s bald spot, no matter how hard I tried I kept staring.  Also fascinating was Elton John’s inability to know the words to any of the hymns sang. Fergie’s kids had rather hideous hats. Chelsea got a bummer seat, plonked next to someone she air-kissed. Harry looked bored. Beckham wore his OBE medal on the wrong side. Hmm, I swear Kate choked over the word “poorer” during the “richer for poorer” spiel . Oooh and that ring looked like it wasn’t gonna fit. You twist not push Will!!!! Mommy Middleton looked like the cat who swallowed the canary while hubby just sweated profusely! Everyone got a royal welcome except for Charles and Camilla (not crowd pleasers). Poor darl must be still spitting chips she was married at a registry office!

Psst Rumors are that Kate will place her wedding bouquet on Princess Diana’s grave.

16 Comments

Filed under I'm Just Saying !

That Wedding Went Off With A Big Bang

Welcome to the wedding from hell. The groom at a Brazilian wedding announced he had a surprise for the guests then shot dead the bride and the best man before turning the gun on himself. Police believe the murder suicide by Rogerio Damascena was pre-planned though horrified wedding guests say there was no indication anything was wrong.

Psst Are you thinking what I’m thinking…..best man and bride?

2 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, End Credit, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Wedding Fail

Holy mud brick house Batman. Over 65 people have died during a wedding in a remote area of Afghanistan after the top floor of a mud brick house collapsed. Most of the dead were women and children. The provincial Governor said “People don’t build such strong houses as they do in the city,” Hmm, no shit Sherlock!  I’m guessing the honeymoon is pretty much over!

Leave a comment

Filed under End Credit, I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

Shotgun Wedding

Whoopsie. An Italian wedding photographer is dead after he was accidentally shot in the head with a hunting rifle after he had asked the bride and groom to pose with it. Calogero Scimea was shot when teenage sweethearts Valentina Anitra and Ignazio Licodia were about to tie the knot. They were at the groom’s parents home in Sicily prior to the wedding when Scimea asked  if they had any guns he could use as a prop. It is unclear if the rifle went off while the photographer was handling it or whether someone accidentally pulled the trigger. Either way the wedding was canceled and the groom’s parents face prosecution. All and all a friggin crap day!

5 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, End Credit, Whoops!

Wedding Photographer Fail

I really hate it when this happens!!!!! Awkward, embarrassing and a friggin nightmare to recover from.

7 Comments

Filed under Friggin Awesome, Friggin Hilarious, How Embarrassing, Whoops!

I Do

Oh boy, you men in India better be on your toes if you decide to marry.Seems women scammers are on the rise. Take for instance some poor groom and his family from Uttar Pradesh who thought everything was friggin rosy after the wedding. Little did they know the bride was cooking up a poisonous concoction. When neighbors noticed the house latched from the outside they went to investigate and found the entire family unconscious.Oh yes, it gets worse, when the family regained consciousness they released they had been friggin fleeced. Cash gone, jewelry gone, valuables gone, bride gone and her whole friggin family gone. Bitch!

5 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never

Princess And The Pauper

A big shout out to Sweden’s future Crown Princess Victoria, she is about to marry her personal trainer and he’s a friggin commoner. Not that there is anything wrong with that! Hmm, Daniel Westling must be really good at push ups.

2 Comments

Filed under I'm Just Saying !, You Go Girl!